Monday 12 February 2007

my arm

i managed to use the vein on the back of my arm. for the past few weeks constantly. i thought my god! for once my body is not letting me down, but after the first week it clearly let me know it had. my whole right arm from mid-forearm to shoulder is numb. its terrble, i have been poking it with pins, as in syringes, right in as far as they will go, no feeling. i try to pick up things but i cannot do it. there is literally no feeling there. i can still get the vein, just. i cannot feel as the pin goes in, and it takes a while to find a vein. but after every one, nearly after everyone, i get the most dreadful pins and needle all throughout my hand upwards. i cannot do anything with it. luckily, i have had somebody with me to get my hits because my right arm spasms so much and i need them to hold it still so i can get the hit using my left.
i think something is up with my vein. i did a hit today and didn’t feel it for about 3 minutes, then suddenly it hit. when i put it all in, the pain in my right forearm was so unbelievable, like something was building up in the vein. i think my hit was stuck there (i left the torniquet tight on as i lept up because of the pain and didn’t even think about removing it) and it finally got into the stream.

im in debt, ive lost even more. my body cannot cope with this.